How to be the person you always wanted to be (Part 1)
Everyone dreams, at some point in their life, of becoming the very best version of themselves. You may want to be a professional athlete, a world-famous artist or singer, or simply the very best parent you can be. Achieving your full potential can seem like a mighty task to undertake, but it’s entirely within your abilities to do so. The real question is how to do it. In the next few blogs, we will be looking at three ways you can become the best person you can be: 1. Taking Inventory of Who You Are; 2. Putting In the Work; and 3. Promoting Positive Vibes. In this blog, we’ll focus on taking inventory.
Taking Inventory of Who You Are
You may be asking “what do you mean by that?” In business, it’s called a SWOT analysis. That is, it means that you are looking at your Strengths, your Weaknesses, your Opportunities for growth, and your possible Threats or roadblocks to your goals. To know yourself, to know your inventory, you must do your own SWOT analysis. In doing so, here are a few things to consider.
Recognizing Your Own True Value
The secret to becoming all that you want to be, everything you have dreamed of becoming is in realizing that the version of you already that you are dreaming of already exists within you. You have within you the very best version of yourself. Michelangelo, when asked how he carves such wonderful marble statues, he said, “I simply remove all the rock that isn’t part of the statue.” Like him, you just need to recognize those attributes that do not serve you, and become more fully your ideal self. Everything that you need to become this person is within you, as are all of the resources.
Some people tend to focus on the outside world and depend on the influence of others to determine their own self-worth. Relying on external events and stimulus to make you who you are will often lead to a constant fear of everything being taken away, including your dreams. True inner power comes from understanding, acknowledging, and believing that the source of all you desire is already within yourself.
Look For Roadblocks
There is an old quote that you may already be familiar with which states, “The only thing holding you back is you.” This is true. However, this does now mean that you cannot be completely impervious to outside influences. Take some time to reflect on your current attributes or habits. Which ones of these reflect who you want to be? Which ones don’t? Sometimes, you might not even recognize all of your habits, good or bad. In fact, to be honest, most of us simply don’t see ourselves very clearly.
To help with that, you may want to speak in confidence with loved ones and associates about what they recognize in you as both your strengths and weaknesses. You may be surprised. I know I was.
Regardless of their answers. Most of us have two weaknesses that affect us to a greater or lesser extent. They are also two of the main ones that can have the largest influence and ability to hold you back: Self-doubt and Procrastination.
Self-doubt is something we have all experienced at one time or another in our lives. This is an extremely powerful influence in many people’s lives, often leaving the individual immobile and unable or unwilling to change, usually from the fear of failure. One great way to fight against self-doubt is to look for evidence of successes in your life. Identify all of the amazing things you have already accomplished. Don’t allow yourself to discount the success or blame it on external circumstances or others. You succeeded because of who you are, and the opportunity you chose to accept. You’d be surprised how many successes you can find when you put your mind to it.
Procrastination is another strong roadblock we might have relied on from time to time. This undesirable trait can often be a direct result of your own self-talk. Surprisingly, it isn’t always negative self-talk that it always comes from. If you tell yourself that you work well under pressure, and believe it, that’s great! That allows you to put things off until just before it’s too late, since, you work well under pressure…
That also allows the pressure to build, the guilt, the anxiety… The reality is that the task you are working on won’t really take that long to accomplish. The hardest part is deciding how and when to get started. Are you really looking forward to having to pull an all-nighter to finish this task? Doubtful. So what can be done to overcome procrastination? Take some time to figure out why you might be procrastinating. Set a schedule to get started. With bigger tasks, break it down into smaller subtasks you can work on. And sometimes, even a change in your environment can help to break this procrastination.
Releasing Thoughts That Contradict Your Truth
Anytime you think a negative, critical, fearful, or harmful thought about yourself, you are unintentionally disconnecting yourself from who you want to be and from your own truths in life. Each time you tell yourself you can’t do something or you can’t have something, it becomes its own self-fulfilling prophecy. Doing this will not help you to reach those goals you have in mind, and eventually it will lead to you giving up. Your truth is that you have it in you to become anything you want to become. When you believe it, you can achieve it.
Stop these unhelpful thoughts in their tracks. You may not have the option to not think them, but you do have the option to not dwell on them. Recognize them as they appear, then challenge them, then dismiss them. If you find yourself saying “I can’t do this” when you try something new, realize that this could very well be one of those moments when you are telling yourself something that isn’t true. Demanding evidence that proves you can’t do this task might seem a little silly at first, but do this anyway. And when you have the thought of “I can’t do this”, instead try replacing it with “I am afraid of trying this, but I won’t know if I can succeed until I try.”